It’s a matter of time.

In a meeting yesterday, someone said, while discussing next steps for a project. “We’ve got to get started because, before you know it, a month will have passed and you didn’t even notice.”

Time is on my mind.

As I look forward to where I want to be in the next 6 to 12 months, I see possibilities expanding for me to move beyond the work I do now, day to day, to other things I want to do.

Like paint more.

Write more.

Create more and inspire more through my creations.

And then I trip over myself.

Yesterday, I took on an added workload. When I walked out of the meeting where I’d volunteered to take it on, I had to ask myself, what have I done?

I knew what I’d done. I’d said yes to being of service to others without first stopping to ask myself, Does this serve me well? (And yes, there might just have been a little bit of the ‘I can’t say no’ chatter going on in my head too!)

There is nothing wrong with taking on more work, or pitching in to help out in a bind. In fact, stepping into the world from a place of, “How can I be of service”, creates space for gratitude and humility to be present.

However, when being of service to others adds stress or diminishes your capacity to step continually forward towards your passions, then the act of service is not being made from a place of humility. It is coming from a place of hubris. It won’t lead to an attitude of gratitude. It just leads to resentment, especially when you set yourself up to be taken advantage of through not asking for what is fair, or right, or what you deserve.

I like to feel wanted. That what I do makes a difference. When I diminish my value however, by not standing true to what is important — ie. asking for what I deserve or saying no when I need to — then I am not coming at the work with a ‘pure heart’. I’m stepping in with a hungry heart.

I have a vision to retire and immerse myself in inspiring others to explore their creative essence through offering workshops and teaching people how to tune into their creative core to express themselves freely.

I won’t get there if I don’t stand up for myself and take time to consider each item on my plate and the value it brings to moving me closer to fulfilling on my vision for my life.

Finding balance, measuring our time and considering how best to fill it to create value for ourselves and the world around us, is essential to living pure of heart in gratitude and humility.

Point taken.

 

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The sixth painting in my #ShePersisted series is HERE.

8 thoughts on “It’s a matter of time.

  1. I am reminded of that song by Annie in Oklahoma, “I’m just a girl who can’t say no, I’m in a terrible fix …”

    When we want something done we don’t ask lazy people, we ask busy people – because they get shit done. And they have energy, drive and skills to get it done. You have those.

    And there is no reason to quit. You mention that curse-word ‘retire’ and I cringe because that, in its ‘pure-sit-on-sidelines’ sense is a death sentence. Keep living, loving, working, pushing rocks up steep hills – that’s you mission … should you choose to accept it (I’m channeling Mission Impossible) … because you KNOW it is mission-possible.

    You take on lots, agree to lots and commit to lots – and you do great work. Don’t quit. Yes, organize better, set priorities better – and remember what the GPS says when you change directions: ‘recalculating, recalculating’ …

    Keep going to meetings, but maybe fewer … and leave early.

    Keep putting your hand up, but maybe more selectively.

    Keep being someone who does everything and be someone who does everything that matters most to you.

    When you are gone, will you have passed your tasks, your drive, your vision to others? If you don’t, we’ll be in a terrible fix …

    m

    Liked by 1 person

    • Love the channeling Mark — I hear you re that word ‘retire’ — I am reframing it for myself — it’s not to sit on the sidelines, it’s to stand and march and walk and leap and sit if I feel like it — someplace where I haven’t been before! 🙂

      I also like the ‘putting my hand up more selectively’ — great advice!

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  2. There’s certainly a sense of not doing enough, especially here in the US where hope seems quite dim at best. I struggle with finding the right volunteer work that is purposeful, not merely busy work, but also flexible in schedule to allow me time to address other things like aging parents, little ones, etc. Not easy. Very easy to slip into a feeling that I’m not doing anything to help. Keep doing your gorgeous, meaningful art, Louise. I’d love to see them become greeting cards, posters, etc. that you could sell.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Lisa — I hear you about that sense of dim hope. Even here in Canada, I feel the ripples of what is happening there, and I feel confused, concerned… I don’t like that I have this visceral sense of loathing for ‘that man’. I keep moving into loving-compassion — and it is a struggle! I suppose that is the way of meditation — to keep moving into the places where I resist.

      And thank you for your amazing support of the #ShePersisted series — I am moving forward with it and will be creating cards to sell. I love your idea of giving proceeds back to charity — I also appreciate your offer of donating. how kind.

      Thank you!

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  3. Oh, Louisa…I completely understand! There is a fine line between being of service and helping others while keeping enough time for yourself! I am rowing a similar boat…and if I figure it out I will let you know ! 💜💜

    Liked by 1 person

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