Touched by grace

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I was touched by grace yesterday. My spirit gently kissed by the whispers of compassion, kindness, forgiveness.

I was moved by grace’s beauty. Her softness. Her stillness.

I felt her presence when I came home. There in the mailbox was a book with a card tied to it with a silky white ribbon. Not sure who had left it, I eagerly opened it and was surprised to see the sender’s name at the bottom of the message.

Really?

Wow.

What grace.

The book and card were a gift from a woman with whom I’d had a falling out about a year ago. I’d done something. She’d done something. We hadn’t agreed on the value of our respective somethings and agreed instead to part ways. We both had our ‘stories’.  We both had our higher ground and lower perceptions of what she did/I did, what she didn’t do/I didn’t do, to create the discord. And, regardless of our respective positions, we both lost a connection we valued. I missed her presence in my life. I missed  our conversations, the way she challenged my thinking, not to mention the fact she is one of the few people I know who needs to constantly read and learn from as many similar books as me.

Over time, however, I’d let my regrets of the discord between us go. When we occasionally saw each other at an event, we’d smile, say hello, be polite and go our separate ways.

Occasionally, I’d think about contacting her, but pride, ego, ennui, the chatter of my critter telling me ‘she doesn’t want to talk to you’, ‘she doesn’t even like you’, ‘you don’t need that kind of drama in your life’, blah blah blah, kept me from taking steps to attempt to repair what was broken.

And then I arrived home to find her light envelop me through the gift of her words and thoughtfulness.

I am blessed.

One of the invitations we are extending through the upcoming Summer of Peace Calgary 2012 initiative is to encourage people to ‘make peace’ by healing rifts, discord, broken threads in the tapestry of their lives.

This relationship is one I had registered in my mind to heal. I had not yet determined how I would reach out and extend peace, and am grateful this woman had the grace and courage to do so now. Sooner is better than later. In her offering, I am graced with peace of mind. I am blessed with knowing, what was broken is forgiven.

There is value in these situations. For me, back when the discord happened, I learned a great deal about my boundaries and about my lack of grace in setting them. And in her gesture today, I learned a great deal about grace and courage.

Yes. I am truly blessed.

In leaving her gift in my mailbox, she has made a world of difference. In reading her words, I too am made different by the knowledge there is value in all situations, there is wonder in all happenings. Letting go of discord doesn’t mean picking up where we left off. It means, continuing on free of the burden of regret, anger, resentment, sorrow — all the things we humans carry around with us when we do not make peace with what we’ve done, or how we’ve been in relationship to others that caused pain or sorrow, or anger and resentment to grow. Free of the negative, we can both move in the beautiful light of love knowing, all is well in our hearts.

Is there someone you need to make peace with today? Is there someone to whom you can extend forgiveness?  Try it. You might like it! You might even feel touched by grace.

17 thoughts on “Touched by grace”

  2. What a great story I enjoyed this post as I do all of your posts, I am lucky that I can say that I can’t think of a single person I need to make peace with anymore. I think that comes from me accepting people for who they are and not judging them and trying to change them……….

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  3. Dear Louise,

    I almost called my sister today. Almost.

    One more post like this and you’ll push me over the edge.

    Hugs,
    CZ
    (where are people getting those smilie faces on their replies?? Do you need a wordpress account–or do I need better eyeglasses???)

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  6. Louise, Thanks for your lovely story of healing. I sense in your writing why someone would treasure your friendship enough to reconcile. I recall a friend who used to criticize my gestures of friendship as not measuring up although I gave considerably. She admitted she wanted as much attention as a spouse, which took time away from my actual spouse. She didn’t relent until I said, “I’m done.” Later, I hugged her and give her a note, to let her know I still love her. Unfortunately, the friendship was an energy drain I couldn’t actively resume. In my case, mutual forgiveness required letting go and saying goodbye.

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    • I recognize that place too Cara — having let a woman friend go many years ago — I just didn’t have your grace though! I basically just hid out for awhile from her until she got the message I was no longer available to do the things she needed doing… constantly. Actually, with this friend what was most challenging were her lies — I simply could not endure them. But it was still hard. She had so many beautiful qualities. Hugs. Thanks so much for dropping by.

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  7. Oh dear, Louise, this is hitting home. But I am the one being rejected in my situation and so I don’t know how to fix it. I have tried many times and she is rejecting my efforts. Sad. It is family, not just a friend. I’ve had to just let go until she’s ready to reconcile. However, this has played out several times in my life this past year. Relationships have become so hard. And you can’t force anyone to love you, forgive you, etc. That, I know.

    I am very happy this happened for you. I know how momentous a thing it must be. 🙂

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    • Hi Cindy — I too have experienced it from the other side, and all I could do was to stand in Love and acceptance, knowing, Love and acceptance is all I could live with in my heart. And in the end, Love always wins. Hugs dear one. May your heart know peace.

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