Researchers have determined that we come into this world with two fears: The fear of being suddenly dropped/let go of. The fear of loud noises.
Everything else we fear is determined by early learnings and life’s happenings.
Napoleon Hill said that fears are nothing more than states of mind.
Often, when asked, ‘What is your greatest fear?’ people respond with, ‘Failure’.
I wonder how many great accomplishments never happened, how many songs were never sung, stories never written, paintings never created, cures never discovered, destinations never reached, achievements never achieved because someone never took the first step. They feared failing before they even began.
My father used to say that asking someone to help you, or to help you take the next step on the road to getting what you need, gives you a 50/50 chance at Yes.
Not asking gives you a 100% chance at No.
So often, we wait for the right answer, the sure thing, the perfect moment to attempt to do something.
In our waiting we lose the moment of possibility.
Every moment is the perfect moment to live our dreams, to step forward into possibility. To create. To build. To do.
Several years ago, my friend MK had an idea for a project whereby business people met, one-on-one, with individuals with lived experience of homelessness for breakfast. Because the business person has the financial resources, they bought breakfast. No matter who pays, both individuals shared stories of their lives. Shared a meal. A conversation. A moment in time.
He believed it was a great opportunity for both parties to learn from each other, to share breakfast and over that meal to create opportunities for understanding, common ground, compassion while creating opportunity for a host of other human conditions to be explored and expanded.
No expectations. No commitment. Just breakfast.
He tested it out with someone staying at a homeless shelter.
They really liked his idea.
He took the next step and brought his idea to someone with the power to make it happen who worked in the homeless serving sector. At the time, his idea was pooh poohed. Not possible. Too many things can go wrong, he was told.
He held onto his idea.
Recently, at a meeting about the mock election being organized this September for individuals living at shelters, I mentioned my friends idea to a co-worker. He was intrigued.
Tomorrow we have a breakfast meeting with MK to talk about his project, “It’s Just Breakfast” in more depth.
The possibilities are limitless. Sure, there are no guarantees it will move forward. No sure thing of how it will succeed. But that doesn’t matter.
What matters is my friend has not given up on believing, on taking action on his idea, on moving it forward.
In the intervening years he’s done lots of other things, created lots of other possibilities. But this idea still called.
He’s answering its call. He’s taking it to the next step. He’s taking action and in his action, who knows what wonders he’ll create? Who knows what lives he’ll touch, what possibilities he will open up?
He does know if he does nothing, his idea will die a lonely, unfulfilled death.
He does know that if he lets that first ‘no’ be the final one, we wouldn’t be having breakfast tomorrow.
And in the end, “It’s Just Breakfast”.
After breakfast, who knows what possibilities will open up in our day?
If we don’t take that first meal together, we do know, nothing will happen.
Now it can.