It was a Be. Do. Have. I wanted to quit on many times throughout the months leading up to the Artists Gone Wild Art Show & Sale.
So much to do. So many things to take care of. And I was busy. Busy with all my other work. Busy with my writing. My taking care of business. My life!
Who had time to devote to organizing an art show? I mean really? Why bother? I bet no one comes. I bet those who do will think it’s awful. I bet the other artists won’t like me. Or will be so much better than me I’ll look stupid.
Ah yes, the critter was in full blown panic attack — let’s undermine Louise’s sense of well-being because we all know she’s such a loser when it comes to commitment and living her dreams.
And then there was the guilt. Such a waste of energy but oh so familiar a space to writhe around in.
The lion’s share of the running around, making phone calls, organizing and figuring out fell onto the shoulders of Tamara, one of our Basement Bombshells Art Collective members. She was doing it all and my head kept telling me I was doing nothing.
Fortunately, neither critter nor guilt were powerful enough to stop the show from happening — we’d already paid for the space, postcards and other things necessary to promote and put on the show. We were committed whether my agents of self-sabotage had a say in it or not!
I am grateful.
Grateful for all I’ve learned over the years about who I am and what lengths my critter voice will go to undermine and pull me off my course.
I am grateful I have learned to recognize his hissy incantations calling me to give up, step away, let go of my dreams.
And I am grateful for the support of all those I know and love who remind me every day to stay the course, stand true and walk my path with love and joy.
The show was a success. Personally and in the bigger picture of the show.
Personally, I sold 10 paintings. Professionally, as an artist, I was given affirmation of my talent, my capacity to create art that speaks to others. What a gift!
We’ve sent out a survey to the other artists, and the feedback is positive — it was a success! The Possibilities Project artists felt welcomed and sold some works, and, we raised over $1400 at the Silent Auction for Alpha House!
It wasn’t that I doubted (okay, maybe I did a little bit). It was that I questioned whether or not my style, my unique expressions would please others enough that strangers would walk in and purchase my work. ( They did. In fact, one couple bought two of my paintings!)
Because, even though I say I don’t paint to sell my work, there is, just possibly, a tiny little whisper of a dream inside me that I could make a living from my writing and artwork….
I love to paint. I love to immerse myself in the process and get lost in exploring what happens when I simply let go of doing and become one with the piece I’m working on.
At the show, I took one of my art journals to have it there as an example of ‘possibility’.
There are no limits, no dont’ do that’s, no never put red beside orange rules in art journalling I told people who stopped to take a look at the journal. There is only the page. Only the expression of whatever is happening as you paint and collage and sticker up and glitter up and glaze over whatever you’re doing.
I wanted to test the waters to see if there was any interest in art journalling courses.
And now I have my next Be. Do. Have.
To hold a two-day Artifying your Soul workshop!
Yesterday, as I was walking back from a luncheon, I stopped in at a new little wine store I happened to pass by. I met the owners at a Community engagement Open House we’d held on one of the Foundation’s new buildings in the city. They’d shared the story of their new endeavour, about how their Be. Do. Have was coming to life. I promised to drop in and I did.
And in the process, found a space for another endeavour I want to undertake — Nights of Wine and Creativity — An evening to taste wines and explore simple art creations.
I recently read of a woman in California holding art making evenings in a winery — and thought what a brilliant idea. Wine. Nibblies. Canvases ready to go and an evening of painting away for fun — couples attend a lot of them and it looked like such a happy endeavour.
I spoke to one of the owners and…. we’re going to talk some more!
Staying focused on my Be. Do. Have. keeps the critter’s voice from rising above the fear I will fall if I step into my dreams, unfold my wings and let myself fly free.
One of the paintings that did not sell is one of the paintings I wanted to keep — the one on which I wrote…. She never imagined she could fly until one day she dared to believe…. in herself.
I am grateful it didn’t go. It is now hanging in my living room, reminding me always that we are born to fly free of our fears because we are born to succeed at living this one wild and passionate life in the rapture of now.