All I need to feel at peace exists within me.

It wasn’t as warm as the weather report said it would be, but once I dropped down off the escarpment, the wind died down and it felt less frigid.

Though, I hadn’t quite planned for how cold it was. I’d worn my gloves and not my mitts and my fingers felt the chill. I walked and tucked my hands into my jacket pocket. For a moment, my mind wanted me to believe that I was stupid to not wear my mittens. I told it to be quiet. It had nothing to do with my intelligence and everything to do with not wanting to be disturbed by less than thinking interrupting my walk.

It didn’t matter what I wore. The sun was shining, the birds tweeting and twittering all around. The day was glorious.

I dropped by Ellie, The Wonder Pooch’s memory place in the woods, took a picture of her two hearts nestled amidst the trees and snow and text them to my daughters, “She’s always with us,” I wrote.

And it’s true. Over six months since the wonder pooch’s passing, and still I feel her presence. I also still miss her quiet padding along beside me, tugging at the leash, stopping to sniff at every leaf and branch upon the trail.

Walking without her does have its advantages though. I can sit on a bench for as long as I like and not have her nudging me to get going, get moving along! Which means, I can sit and enjoy the silence, close my eyes and breathe into the soundscape all around, mapping the sounds as I learned to do from Sherri Phibbs of the W.I.S.H. Studio.

I listened deeply to the world around me. I listened to the birds, the chittering of a squirrel, the grass rustling in the soft breeze that meandered through the creek bed. I listened to the silence of the snow hanging at the edges of a tree branch as it let go with a soft whoof and fell to the ground. I listened to the way the fir tree needles grate against one another when the squirrel who was stealing all the bird seed skittered back across their branches. And in the distance, I listened to the muffled sound of city traffic carried across the miles by the wind.

And I listened to the stories the wind had to tell me of the faraway places it had roamed, the sites it had seen, the wonders it had witnessed.

I listened and felt the awe of the moment descend around me and envelop me in the possibility of a world where each of us is doing more today than we did yesterday to create a world of peace, love, hope and joy all around us.

In the quiet of the woods, I sat and listened to the wind and felt my spirit softly settle within me.

Yes. There is war and hatred and intolerance and abuse and homelessness and disease and cruelty and distrust. They all exist in this world.

And so does love.

It exists along with peace and harmony and people getting along and helping one another. Love exists in tolerance and kindness and giving and cures for diseases and loving compassion. It is there in gentleness and trust and treating each other with respect. It is there in one person helping another to get up, in caring for those who have nothing, those who are sick, those who are feeling blue.

Love exists in giving up a seat on the subway so a mother and child can sit.

It exists in letting a driver merge, in not cutting someone off, in smiling at a stranger, in holding a door open.

In all the intolerance and anger and hurt and pain in this world, love exists.

It’s just sometimes, amidst all the noise we forget to stop and sit quietly listening to our heart beat, listening to the trees rustle, the birds tweet, the wind whispering stories through the trees.

I listened to the stories the wind had to tell me and remembered that in this moment right now, all I need to feel at peace exists within me.

I am grateful.

16 thoughts on “All I need to feel at peace exists within me.

  1. Hi Louise – beautiful post. You will be glad to know (even though I probably haven’t told you much about this, that my estranged sister-in-law are now communicating). She is the mother of the girl who was most injured in Ming’s car accident and she pretty much hasn’t spoken to me since, not because she blames us but because my mother and I were overly attentive and caring and she (sil) wanted us to back off. We then had a horrible email argument. Now we are finding a way to re-connect but the problem is she and I both suffer panicky feelings if we have to see each other (family gatherings etc.) Even though we are now communicating and she has broken her silence, it is ultimately I think just a matter of time before we just give up on each other which would be an enormous relief to me. If you can make sense of any of this, I bravo you haha! Love your soul, Louise!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. You’re ever so right, Louise! What a wonderful reminder and perspective you’ve shared here. I love nature for that very reason. The quiet, the beauty and awe of it. I think too much focus on world news is damaging. It’s more than we can handle sometimes and overkill with the information.

    Back to nature. This reminded me of the smell of snow and quiet that comes with snowfall. I miss those qualities as I’m now on the rainy coast by the ocean. I have beauty all around and the ocean is my favorite place but the snow…it’s kind of sweet.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. This was so lovely, did you read about my ghost dog, I saw our dog Dot Dot sitting outside my bedroom door last week she has been gone for a bloody long time and it is the first time we have seen her but it was awesome to see he sitting outside the bedroom door.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I just love the idea of “mapping the sounds”. What an amazing meditation and act of mindfulness. I’ve already passed it on to one other, and I think I will have to try it today. Just not right now when what I’m mapping is the sound of printers, card readers, and keyboards! 🙂


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