Dare boldly

A blog by Louise Gallagher

It’s all about commitment

17 Comments

C.C., Beaumont and Beau’s girlfriend Zali

Every day, morning awakens casting off darkness, pushing into the light of a new day rising.

On the threshold of this new day, the past wanes like the full moon beginning its descent once again into darkness as the earth continues its orbit around the sun. Memory of its fullness eases into the dark as we turn our faces to the sun, trusting that in the waning and waxing of the moon, the night will continue to be full of stars lighting up the night.

Tonight is the night of the full moon. According to this article in Elephant Journal,

Full moons tend to bring our underlying personal relationship issues to the surface.  It’s not that it exacerbates what wasn’t there, but more like the fullness of the moon is a reflection of our hearts.

Last night, as C.C. and I drove to meet my youngest daughter and her partner for dinner at a new Mission area restaurant, we had the following conversation.

Me:   Wow. Look at the moon. It’s almost full.

C.C.: You don’t think it’s full?

Me:    (Squinting my eyes to check for shadows on the moon’s face) Hmmm… Maybe it is. Hard to tell.  If it’s not yet full, it’s almost there.

C.C.:  I think it’s there.

Me:    Oh good. I like the full moon. I read somewhere that in South America they don’t see a man in the moon. They see a bunny.

C.C.:  I see a bunny.

Me:    You do?

C.C.:  Yup. His ears are going to the right and he’s hopping to the left.

Me:    Maybe you’re South American!

C.C.:  I hope so. It’s warmer there.

And that’s why I love this man so much.

He likes to make me laugh. He’s smart, always kind and always supportive of me and my whimsy.

Work in Progress Mixed Media

Work in Progress
Mixed Media

No matter what I’m working on in my studio, he is always willing to come down to check it out whenever I ask. His feedback is always honest, which I appreciate more than platitudes, and his suggestions inevitably surprise me with their spot on direction. He’s also willing to come downstairs, sit in the big leather recliner in the corner and read while I paint. He doesn’t try to talk to me. He simply shares his presence. I love that about him. He gives me space to create while being present in community.

And, he believes there is magic and mystery in this big ole’ world, or at least, is willing to support me in my awe-struck wonder at the world we live in.

He also likes to tell me I’m special, which is kind of special of him!

And what could be better than that? To have someone in your corner, cheering you on, supporting you and telling you you’re special even when you’re standing in your grungies, paint spattered on your face in place of make-up, a frown furrowing your brow as you try to figure out what’s missing or out of balance in whatever you’re working on.

C.C. doesn’t care about the frowns. He loves me just the way I am and in his love, I am learning to trust in love, exactly the way I am.

Last night over dinner, we talked about our one year anniversary coming up in April. “Any big plans?” T, my daughter’s partner asked.

We looked at each other and laughed. We haven’t really discussed it yet.

I jokingly commented, “We’re waiting to see if we make it to one year.” And then I laughed. Because the fact is, I have no doubts we’ll make it to one year. “It’s pretty amazing,” I added. “We haven’t had a single argument since we got married where I throw up my arms and say, ‘That’s it. I’m done.’ “(That tended to be my response to moments of dissension — I quit.)

Now, I don’t play the ‘I quit’ card. Marriage has changed all of that.

“It’s about commitment,” C.C. said.

We are committed.

Like the earth’s orbit around the sun, we are committed to this path together. It doesn’t matter whether the moon is waxing or waning or the stars are shining bright or hiding behind the fullness of the moon. No matter where in the world we are, our hearts are a reflection of the fullness of Love shining brightly between us as we travel together on this journey of life.

.***************************************

and… get inspired with this amazing Tedx Talk about happiness — it’s all in the strength and healthiness of our relationships.

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Author: Louise Gallagher

I believe we each have the capacity to be the change we want to see in the world, to make a world of difference. I believe we are creative beings on the journey of our lifetimes. It's up to each of us to Live It Up and SHINE!

17 thoughts on “It’s all about commitment

  1. while I boast no personal formula for marriage success, friends of mine who married (2nd time for each of them) said it was like buying a life insurance policy – but they weren’t buying the ‘whole life’ plan, instead choosing a renewable policy … and they’ve been renewing annually for fifteen years now. I like that concept.

    continued success to you both

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I can’t even commit to myself without throwing up my hands. Fortunately, I’m reasonably sure I will never be in a relationship.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I hesitated to hit the ‘like’ button for your comment Kerri — not because I didn’t ‘like’ it but rather, but more because I struggle with the visual of committing to yourself making you throw up your hands.

      If I could wish anything for anyone, it is that they would see how magnificent they are so that they could commit to themselves to treat themselves with tender loving care so that they could shine brightly for all the world to see their magnificence. Hugs

      Liked by 1 person

  3. You are blessed that you waited to learn how to trust again. To see how he is doing it right this time around before jumping back into love. To basically grow up first.
    I don’t think I ever let that part of me grow up, at least not first. I think THAT is the secret to success. (I started to say trick but secret sounds so much more romantic.) 😊💕
    I know this time you have it figured out. It’s all about knowing that people are different and our experience with abuse was not the normal. The problem with abuse, is you begin to expect it or the first time someone disagrees we expect abuse to follow, when it doesn’t we either learn how to argue like grown ups or make it into a drama that never was really there.
    Happy Anniversary in April! Wow that went by fast didn’t it?

    Liked by 1 person

    • I love the wisdom within your comment Di. And yes, growing up is essential, though I’m not sure it’s growing up as much as growing into our own magnificence so that we don’t seek light from others and find it first within. Thanks — and yes, it has gone fast! 🙂

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  4. Having a relationship like that, like what i have too, is a wonderful thing. Don’t you wish you had found CC earlier in your life though? That’s what we say, would have avoided a lot of crap.

    Liked by 1 person

    • C.C. said awhile ago that if we had found each other when we were younger, we would still be together now. Perhaps he’s right. I kind of think I had a bit of growing into myself to do before I could love another fearlessly. And yes — the crap would have been nice to avoid, but it sure did make my life richer! 🙂

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  5. Beautiful artwork! And thanks for sharing the Ted clip, very informative and true.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. The Ted Talk is a marvel (even though based on research only on men) and a lot to be learned that ALL relationships count not just partnerships. I love the Mark Twain quote at the end “There isn’t time – so brief is life – for bickering, apologies, heartburn, calling to accounts. There is only time for loving and only an instant, so to speak, for that.”

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Been married for 32 years and still going strong, so I know that marriage takes work from both parties

    Liked by 1 person

    • it does take work from both parties Joanne — and I’m learning that sometimes, when I’m tired or just feeling pissy and don’t feel like doing ‘the work’, C.C. does does it all — because he loves me. That never stops to amaze me! 🙂

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