The question rose out of meditation. What do I fear?
I fear feeling insignificant. I fear being ridiculed.
I fear… And I hesitate. No words rise through the darkness that appears when I think of fear.
I dislike cruelty. Posturing. Abuse. I do not fear them.
I dislike people being unkind. Bullies. I dislike seeing animals mistreated. Children starving. There is much that I dislike. Much I find distasteful.
But what do I fear?
I fear feeling small.
And if I take off the last qualifier, I become my fear of feeling.
I fear feeling.
Cut back to the bone, strip away the skin, peel back the sinew and the veins and I find myself amidst the skeletal remains of my fear of being — nothing. Cut out the tissue. Skim off the blood and get to the guts of what I fear.
What is it?
What is my biggest fear?
Not being loved. Not knowing love? Losing love?
But love is limitless.
as only love.
I am afraid
the ones I love
the things I love
I am afraid.
But I cannot lose Love which makes the fear of losing the one’s I love impossible. For, even when they are gone, love continues, love exists, Love is. Infinite. Limitless. All.
There is nothing
for Love is
to hold me
where I feel
I cannot separate Love with fear. I cannot divide it with 3 parts fear one part avoidance.
and there is