It can be easy sometimes to get caught up in believing someone is doing something purposefully to bother you.
To skip over the possibility they are doing whatever they are doing with good intention, not ill. Or that they are simply unaware of the impact of their actions on you and others.
When we are feeling stressed, overlooked or under-appreciated, we humans tend to see ill-intentions all around.
Giving grace, holding space for others to have good intentions or to be unaware is vital to our capacity to live life in peace and harmony.
If you are reading this today and feeling out of sorts or like the world just isn’t going the way it should, ask yourself:
Am I seeing dark clouds everywhere?
Am I looking for fault in what everyone else is doing, creating a story in my head where I am The Victim and they are wrong?
Be honest. Be humble. Be sincere with yourself.
And if there is any iota of a sense of connection with the questions above, ask yourself…
Is it true? Is the story I’m telling myself in my head about the other person their truth or mine in this moment?
Because, when we ask ourselves if our stories about others are true, inevitably the answer is, “I don’t know.”
We never know the stories of another. We never know what is true for them, unless we ask.
So, if you hear yourself telling yourself that someone is plotting to ruin your day, ask them for their truth. And listen to their answer with a soft heart.
We hold many things as true but when we soften our hearts, we discover light doesn’t bounce around with sharp edges like prism’s of sunlight refracting off a crystal hanging in the window.
In a softened heart, light imbues everything with a warm and loving glow. It soaks in. Warm. Inviting. Welcoming. Healing.
We humans are not all that different. We are all struggling to make sense of this journey of life.
We have all felt heartbreak. Disappointment. Pain.
We have all at some point been confused by the actions of others. Blamed them for our misfortune. Held them accountable for our mis-steps.
We have all felt like ‘nobody understands’ or cares.
And we have all known what it feels like to be misunderstood. Blamed for things we never did. Shunned for things others thought we should do.
It is part of our shared human journey, this place where we jump first to conclusions about another. We tell stories about others and harden our hearts to keep us from standing lovingly in the truth of our own feelings, emotions, accountability, thoughts, creations, mistakes…
As you travel through your day, ask yourself often, “Is the story I’m telling myself about what they’re doing a reflection of them, or a reflection of the story I tell myself about my right to feel…. angry, hurt, confused…. [fill in the blank].
Soften your heart and listen deeply to what it has to say. You may be surprised to discover what your heart truly knows.