Spring has broken out with flora and festivity blossoming everywhere in the city. With its warmer weather, the spring melt has begun in the mountains to the west.
The river is rising.
Living on the river, and hearing of flooding all over the continent, it is easy to get caught up in fixating on water levels rising. I am teaching myself to watch the river flow without immediately connecting to thoughts of ‘how high will it go?’, ‘are we at risk of flooding?’.
It is challenging. To be present to the river flowing without fearing its depths.
Just as it is challenging to be present to life’s inevitable ups and downs without fearing the downs will never turn up again.
Being ‘unemployed’ is and is not as challenging as I imainged. While I’m finding its many upsides I struggle with the concept of ‘doing nothing’.
On the upside, I awaken in the morning feeling refreshed, like I actually had a good night’s sleep without worries and thoughts of tomorrow having interfered with my rest. That feeling that resided at the pit of my stomach, that one that whispered at the edges of my peace of mind, constantly reminding of all I had to do, had not gotten done, is gone.
I am establishing new morning routines — My morning meditation followed by my morning pages. Coffee on the deck listening to the rustle of the trees, the river flowing past and the gentle rumble of the traffic on the bridge.
Eventually, I get to my computer. The need to ‘get ‘er all done’ before 7:15am is gone. I feel… rejuvenated.
I enter my day more leisurely.
I am practising the art of ‘Doing Nothing’.
It ain’t easy.
A confirmed ‘always be doing something’ I struggle to simply sit and be still in this moment right now. As if, watching the river flow, or listening to the trees rustle is not enough.
I am practising.
I am finding the gifts in practice.
Practice takes the pressure off ‘getting it right’, giving me space to be my most human self — perfectly perfect in all my human imperfections.
I am practising the art of ‘Doing Nothing.’
I’m not perfect at it, but I’m perfectly okay with my imperfect practising of the art of Doing Nothing.