When will it end?

Sometimes, on mornings like this when darkness still wraps the world outside my window in its embrace and ice glistens on the river’s surface, and the world continues to hold its breath beneath Covid’s thrall, I wonder… when will it end?

When will booking a flight to somewhere far away in the world, or just to Vancouver to visit my grandchildren, not come burdened with vaccination passports and endless thoughts of should I or shouldn’t I as I weigh the risks and calculate the cost of travelling on my life and the lives of my beloveds?

When will the simple act of going to the grocery store not include wearing a mask, sanitizing my hands at every turn and worrisome thoughts of… What if I get it?

When will it be okay to hug again, or hold hands or sit side-by-side on a park bench or in a restaurant without measuring the distance between us to ensure we’re safe?


And then, I think about the boys and men who went off to war decades ago unsure of when or if they’d make it home and the mothers and children and grandparents and those who had to stay behind. Did they wonder every day, “When will it end?” Did they have doubts and fears that would not lay quiet in the night? Did they worry would they be safe going out the door if they were not close to a bomb shelter? What about their children at school and so far from their loving arms when air raid sirens blasted? Did they worry every day about their loved ones somewhere far away fighting a war so they could be free? Did they wonder when Year 3 started, “Will this be the last year of this war gripping the world in its terror? When will it end?”

And then, I think about the wars that are still being fought today and the millions and millions of refugees uprooted by guns and natural disasters who sit in crowded tents and live in crowded quarters where Covid is not the only risk they face every moment of every day. And how they must worry every single moment about food to eat, a safe place to sleep and wonder, “When will it ever end?” as they go about their days yearning for peace and safety, worrying and wondering about when they will ever have a home to call their own again. Worrying and wondering which country in this world will accept them so that they can build better lives for their children. When will it end?

And then, I think about this freedom I have where I can choose to wear what I want, speak how I want, disagree with government and not be jailed, or killed for my impertinence. This freedom I possess to be myself, to worship or pray or send blessings into the sky or sit at a pew of my choice, to walk the streets without needing a man to accompany me or having to walk a step behind, to drive a car even though I’m a woman, to enter establishments of education, justice, government or places of worship without being barred because of my gender, this freedom… not even Covid can deny me that.

Billions of people around the world do not share in the freedoms I possess.

If killing Covid means I must get a jab or two, and wear a mask and take into account how close I stand to a stranger, then I will do it. It’s good for me and good for you and good for those billions of people around the world who do not share in the freedoms I possess. At least if I take care of my world here now, we all might have a chance to live without Covid in our midst tomorrow and one day, one year, one millennium in the future, we might all walk in freedom, peace and love.


11 thoughts on “When will it end?

  1. Louise – the question – When will it end – is overarching in its scope, justifiably so given the pandemic and other tense situations evolving worldwide. As I reside in the nation’s capital, I would like to add my own spin having just heard the Ottawa Police Chief outline the three-pronged strategy to be used in at least the next 3-4 days. Not WHEN will it end but more importantly, HOW will it end? We may not be directly impacted as we reside in the western reaches of the city. Having lived in the downtown core for a number of years, way back when, I fear the HOW. We have friends living there who may actually move into the M B&B later today, out of fear they may not be able to even leave their residence. We have a close friend who is living out her last days in a palliative care facility and whose loved ones cannot easily access the centre. Need I say more.

    Liked by 1 person

      • Yes it is Bernie — Iwona — I watch the happenings in Ottawa, Coutts and all the planned demonstrations across the country this weekend and feel sickened, sad… and helpless.

        And.. I struggle to find a compassionate response. One that allows room for all views/perspectives to be heard. It’s hard — we have all fels helpless beneath Covid’s pall for so long — I think that possibly, one of the things girding the protesters on is that they are ‘doing something’ — yet, I see the precautions we’ve taken, our vaccination status, our small bubble of people and activities as also ‘doing something’.

        It is disheartening. Here in Alberta, the Premier talks about liftin restrictions this month — and I look back to last July when he declared Alberta “open for business’ and I fear…

        And there’s that ‘fear’ thing — we are all afraid — not only of the virus but of losing jobs, income, homes. Of losing connection, of doing the wrong thing, of covid.

        Sigh. No answers here today other than I keep breathing. I’ve written to my provincial govt representatives. And I breathe and try to find calm in the midst of it all.

        Hugs my friend. Thinking of you a lot these days. ❤


  2. It is borderline shameful to sully the words from the heart of a poet with comments from a card carrying cynic but in response to the question ‘when will it end?’ the answer is totally subjective and depends on the politics of the region involved. In my area of Texas the response to the pandemic was academic whereas across the line in Harris County it was rather severe. Several countries have returned to normal while others are still in lockdown mode. I suppose that it will end, as did the referenced war, when those profiting from it will either have achieved their agendas or have seen them become moot. Thank you for sharing the perspective of our wonderful neighbors to the North.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Ahhh Rixlibris – your wonderful neighbours to the north are in turmoil right now. Trucker convoys block border crossings and city centres and highways and communities.

      Our government waffles.

      And the dividing lines grow longer, wider, deeper.

      Covid is most likely, as so many are saying, here to stay in some form or other. what I hope isn’t here to stay is this divisiveness.

      Thank you for joining in the conversation — I appreciate your words and presence — it isn’t that I too am not cynical and questioning of the motivations of our elected officials and big pharma – it’s more, I find hope a more comforting companion than them! 🙂 ❤


  3. And imagine life during the Second World War when they sent their children overseas to places like Canada, Australia, New Zealand and the USA. They were gone for 2 to 5 years. I’ve written about that on a blog post called https://equipoiselife.wordpress.com/2016/08/10/ripple-effect-of-war/.
    As you referenced war is still ongoing and there are so many that struggle with things we never even give a second thought about.
    Yes we will just be patient and continue to do the right things even if our governments throw us to the wolves.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Agree with you wholeheartedly Louise. There is so much freedom available to me, even Covid can’t take it away. There are so many open spaces and also much space that distance can be maintained, just because it is available when outside of homes and stores. The least I can do is be in gratitude, and be at peace in the world.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Oh yes dear Pragalbha — so much distance -especially here at the foot of the Canadian Rockies — big skies, big views, big space.

      And this — “The least I can do is be in gratitude, and be at peace in the world.” — some days, it is all I can do my friend. ❤

      Liked by 1 person

Real conversations begin with your comments. Please share your thoughts.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.