In the dream, I am running along the edge of a building under construction. I am a couple of floors up. There is someone chasing me. I find a place to hide and tuck myself behind a half-built wall. I peek out and see the person chasing me getting closer. They are now holding a person in front of them as they slowly move towards me.
They have a gun.
I don’t know what to do but know I cannot escape without first trying to rescue the person they’re holding hostage.
When they reach where I’m hiding I leap out, grab their arm. We tussle for control of the gun. I yell at the person to run! They run and I keep wrestling with my pursuer until eventually, they shove me off the edge of the building and I fall to the ground.
Everyone thinks I’m dead. I know I’m not but cannot tell them.
I am on a bed. I want to get up. I want to tell the people gathered around me that I am alive. But no one can hear me.
When everyone leaves, I get off the bed and walk quietly out of the room, putting one foot in front of the other, carefully.
And I awaken.
I lay in bed and wonder about the dream.
And I think about this journey called life. How sometimes, we can appear to be awake, yet we are sleep-walking through each day. The Walking Breathing Dead.
Yesterday, in a phone call with my eldest daughter, we talked about the purpose of writing, of blogs, and our vision for what we want to put out into the world.
I have been pondering this blog for awhile now. Considering what direction I want to take, how I can better focus my writing and in the process, enhance my sense of living on purpose.
“I kind of use my blog as a place to just write what’s on my mind,” I told my daughter. “Perhaps it’s time to get more intentional in how I express my heart.”
If I was fearless of heart what would I write?
If I was intentional in my mind what direction would I take?
I had a dream last night. In it, I was fighting an unknown oppressor that was me.
In dreamspeak, every character in a dream is you.
The one in hiding, the one escaping, and the oppressor. Everyone is you.
If I am both oppressor and the oppressed, if I am fighting and fleeing, does that make me winner and loser?
Balance, inner joy and peace are not found in pitting one part of yourself against the other to see which will win your battle of wills.
Balance, inner joy and peace are found in accepting all are present. In acceptance, love encompasses all we are in this world. In love, all is present without fear. In love, there is everything.
Within each of us exists limitless potential to create, to build, to dream, to shine.
When we battle against ourselves, when we pit one aspect of our being against the other, we lose sight of the beauty and awe of our human essence and limit our creative expressions through our fear of being seen as the magnificent souls we have always been.
I had a dream last night. I am grateful for its call to give into Love.