L’Chaim! To Life!

Last night, as my beloved and I lay in bed reading, he suddenly asked, “Do you know what day tomorrow is?”

“Monday?” I glibly replied.

“Our anniversary,” he clarified with a laugh.

Well my goodness! Seriously?

Neither of us had noted the date.

For C.C., it’s partially because of being immersed in pulling together financing on a business deal. He gets consumed.

For me… well recent events have taken up a great deal of my mindspace. I just hadn’t realized how much until C.C. reminded me of the significance of this date.

As many who read here regularly know, C.C. was in hospital with pneumonia for 10 days at the beginning of the year.

His recovery has been slowed by the presence of COPD in his lungs which makes his breathing laboured. My thoughts have been consumed with making sure COVID doesn’t impede his recovery.

And then, a month ago, while I was in Vancouver, he fell and fractured three ribs. “They’re only bruised,” he told me. “No need to come home. I’ll be fine.”

Sisters surrounded by sisters

Fortunately, my youngest daughter was able to care for Beaumont as he tried to heal and my sister Jackie kept him supplied with food while I was away! It wasn’t until two days before my return that he went for an X-ray and discovered his ribs weren’t bruised but fractured — no wonder moving was almost impossible. All of which has made his breathing even more laboured.

Colour me worried, ’cause I am.

Worried he’ll catch COVID. Worried his breathing will not improve. Worried…

Charlie’s Angels

Add the passing of my dear friend Andrew and I’m hoping you get the picture… my mind is not a calm and clear view of distant horizons and shimmering seas of peaceful waters capable of holding thoughts of health and well-being and death and living alongside dates of note.

The fact is… I have been feeling overwhelmed by it all. Not just these recent events but the whole landscape of this world where war and disease and climate events march in seemingly unending waves of turbulent thoughts engulfing my peace of mind.

It’s time to find my centre, my middle ground as Val Boyko calls it. It’s time to breathe into the chaos and worry to remind myself of that which is always present, always the answer… LOVE

Tolstoy wrote, “Love is life.  All, everything that I understand, I understand only because I love. Everything is, everything exists, only because I love. Everything is united by it alone. Love is God, and to die means that I, a particle of love, shall return to the general and eternal source.”

On this, our 7th Wedding Anniversary, I choose to consciously release worry and fear, sadness and sorrow, to celebrate all that makes my life so rich and vibrant, all that creates such beautiful meaning and joy in everyday.

Our love. Our commitment. Our union. Our marriage.

I can’t change the course of war or disease. I am not powerful enough to cure or heal all the woes of the world.

What I have the power to do is to ensure my own world is filled with all that creates better in this world. Beauty. Art. Joy. Compassion. LOVE.

Today, I celebrate US as I surrender all fear and fall with grace into the eternal source of it all… LOVE.

l’chaim! to LIFE!

21 thoughts on “L’Chaim! To Life!

  1. Good morning Louise ….. I’m so sorry to hear what your husband has been going through and I pray for better days ahead for both of you. Life seems to throw us curve balls when we least expect it. It’s easy to become overwhelmed especially when things are happening to our loved ones. The love and joy in everyone’s faces is so evident when looking at your family in all of these incredible photos of your wedding day. Enjoy your special day today with your dear CC – love truly does conquer all.❤️❤️

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    • Thank you so much Val for your kind and loving words. Yes, it can feel so hard — but when I remember to breathe into Love, it feels less heavy. We had a lovely dinner at a local Mexican restaurant — if we couldn’t be in Mexico it was the next best thing! 🙂 ❤

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  2. Congratulations! A milestone in so many ways. You both have been through a lot in recent months and health takes priority over everything! As to forgetting one’s anniversary, been there done that. In 2010 Marv had his first hip replacement scheduled for April 6. Yup, at the time the date was set neither of us realized its significance. Marv’s cousin gently reminded us and we thought oh well – the hip was more important. After all it was only our 8th wedding anniversary but in reality it was the 23rd anniversary of when we actually got together. Now we joke every year about our double anniversary – wedding / hip!

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  3. Wishing you both a very happy anniversary. So much has been happening for you both and know that we’re here for you if you need anything! I hope you both can take some time away from everything today to celebrate the wonderful life you have created together.

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  4. I thought your silence was a sign that you were busy writing. Health is so crucial to mental well being. I get why you feel so overwhelmed and you will have to come back again and again to reminding yourself to let go of the worry. Guess how I know this….Hugs Bernie

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  5. Always come back to what is present … and reconnect with the love 💕🙏💕 We also celebrated our 15 year anniversary from our first date … not as we imagined as we both have COVID… but sweet all the same. We’ve rescheduled dinner out to next week 🤞🏼

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