My birthday photo today. 72 and I get to choose to not wear make-up!
Another year around the sun, and the emotions are a chaotic, beautiful mess. Joy and weariness co-exist. That’s the whole point, isn’t it? Today, I claim my birthright: unadulterated self-celebration.
Birthdays are a moment of necessary, guilt-free narcissism. We get to hit pause and declare: This is all about me.
But this year’s number – 72 – is different. Seventy-one was the year I finally got clear. I stopped tiptoeing around other people’s visions for my life and stepped fully into my own power. I shed the fear of upsetting someone else’s apple cart and chose to claim ‘the more’ I truly want.
It was a challenging year. We weathered my husband’s health storms, navigating travel with his oxygen and wheelchairs. Yet, I found myself more confident than ever, able to right my own boat in any sea. It was a year of profound firsts: traveling to Europe, (the continent where I spent most of my formative years) with my youngest daughter, discovering Malta (and Maltese hospitality! wow!), and even living on an island.
More than any of those adventures, this past year I finally put down the metaphorical knife I used to fend off intruders to my personal space. I don’t need defense; I need declaration. I claimed my space. Unequivocally.
Here’s to aging, not worrying about whether it’s “graceful” or “fierce.”
Here’s to claiming the right to do it however I damn well please.
What would you tell your younger self? That’s the question that inspired my new mini-booklet, 13 Lessons for My 13-Year-Old Self. It’s a short, powerful guide filled with life lessons on love, living, and finding your way.
I originally wrote the list 11 years ago with 10 messages when my beautiful friend Joyce Wycoff asked me if I would contribute to a book she was creating for her niece’s 13th birthday. Joyce republished it recently to celebrate the same niece’s 24th birthday.
I’m so grateful she shared her post with me. As she always does, she inspired me to ‘create better’.
If you would like to read the 13 lessons, you can download a complementary copy of the booklet HERE for a limited time.
I saw an image on Instagram this morning that really resonated with me. A beautiful butterfly with the caption: “Magic happens when you stop shrinking to fit spaces you’ve outgrown.”
It’s how I look at aging. I’ve outgrown my 50s, 60s, and now, I’m growing and expanding into my 70s, devouring every delicious bite of being this age of empowered living.
Somewhere in my 30s, I realized I was being sold a load of horse-manure by the cosmetic industry. “Anti-aging.” “Anti-vaginal odor.” “Anti-anything” some clever marketer thought women should address in order to stay, reclaim, or feel young again.
It was as if they were whispering (though it often felt like shouting), “Being your age is okay, but looking, smelling, and feeling it? No way! That just means you’re old.”
Well, guess what? I’m in my 70s now. And I have not stopped aging. Shocking, isn’t it? What I have done is stop buying into the anti-aging narrative. There is nothing in it for me to be afraid of aging. Heck, I’ve been doing it every single day of my life. I’m an aging expert. And in my vast repertoire of experience, I’ve learned a thing or two about the anti-aging movement.
Anti-aging is anti-women being themselves. It’s a relentless campaign to convince us that our natural state is a problem to be solved.
Anti-aging is a confidence racket. It’s constructed to make us feel bad about how we look, act, dress, talk, and even smell. The goal isn’t to make us beautiful; it’s to make us insecure.
Anti-aging is a multi-billion dollar industry. I can’t fight the industry, but I can fight back by not buying their horse-manure. My wallet is my weapon.
What about you? Are you done shrinking? Are you ready to claim your right to be your age—with all the grace, sass, and dignity you’ve earned?
Let’s start a revolution. A quiet, powerful, and deeply personal revolution.
Your Call to Action:
Stop playing their game. Look in the mirror today and say, “This is me. This is my magic. Aren’t I magnificent!”
What is one small, rebellious act you’re doing to embrace your age? Maybe it’s ditching the painful heels for a pair of shoes that love your feet. Maybe it’s not hiding the grey or wearing a bold new lipstick that makes you feel powerful or finding your power in opting out of make-up entirely á la Suzanne Sommers. Maybe it’s simply refusing to feel ashamed of a new wrinkle and choosing instead to see each one as a celebration of your life story.
Please do share your story in the comments below. Let’s celebrate our earned wisdom, our hard-won freedom, and the deliciousness of being exactly where we are. Because magic doesn’t happen when we shrink; it happens when we expand.
Why the fear of not having a purpose is holding you back—and how to find freedom in every single act.
We talk a lot about purpose. We talk about finding it, earning it, and living it. But in our obsession with finding a purpose, we often trap ourselves in a constant state of anxiety and comparison. We get stuck in an unhealthy emotional morass, believing others have a grander purpose than we do—or that we have non at all. This leads to a cascade of negative beliefs: I’m not good enough. I don’t make a difference. I’ll never measure up. I don’t matter.
The fear of not having a purpose often propels us into dead-end streets and chaos corners. It compels us to keep searching, to never let our guard down, and to stand vigilant for some grand purpose to float by so we can claim it. We tell ourselves, “I’ll finally matter when I find my purpose!”
What if you don’t have to search for purpose? What if all you need to do is live on purpose?
The Heavy Load of Finding Your Purpose
Countless books have been written about finding your purpose. We often see purpose as “what we do in the service of others,” as if it’s a monumental job description we must earn. Yet, what we do in service is simply a reflection of how we live our lives every day, in alignment with our values, principles, and beliefs.
The other night, while having dinner with my two daughters, we went around the table and shared a unique quality we admired in one another. When it was my turn, both of my daughters said, “You have a unique ability to meet people where they’re at and see the good in them.”
My heart felt so light. Since retiring and moving to a quiet Gulf Island, I’ve struggled with the question, “How do I live my purpose when I’m not ‘out there’ in the world, making a difference?” Hearing my daughters’ words, I realized I am making a difference just by showing up in my world every day with an open and loving heart and mind. By being fully present, I am both living my purpose and living on purpose.
There’s great relief in that acceptance. A feeling of spaciousness and possibility. I’ve accepted that my purpose doesn’t have to be some grandiose idea of healing the sick or solving world poverty. It’s simply to live my best, in every moment of every day, so my ripple is one of love, joy, and harmony. In this act, I gift myself peace of mind, body, and heart. And from that space, living on purpose feels easy, and the world around me feels calm and accepting.
The Lightness of Living on Purpose
One of the biggest differences between having a purpose and living on purpose is that having a purpose is passive, while living on purpose is active.
A purpose can be a goal—a destination to reach. Goals are important, but when they’re the singular focus and not rooted in our values, we can lose sight of our impact on the world. Hyper-focused on attainment, we can believe our goal is all that matters – and everyone else better get out of our way.
Living on purpose, however, demands our full engagement with life. It’s an intentional practice that requires our attention. It’s the realization that everything we do, say, create, and think has a ripple effect.
If you want your ripple to be an invitation to others, you must be conscious of the waves you make.
Living on purpose is not about the things you acquire or the goals you achieve; it’s about how you live your life. Living on purpose illuminates the world all around you. And in that brilliance, your light becomes a beacon of hope for others.
Practical Steps for Living on Purpose
It’s easy to live on purpose when you know the values, principles, and beliefs that guide your every action, word, and thought. Clarity of what matters most will automatically underpin everything you do, creating space for you to live intuitively and intentionally.
Here are three simple, actionable steps to start living your purpose right now:
Clarify Your Values: Your purpose is built on your values. Take some time to identify what matters most to you—things like honesty, compassion, creativity, or courage. Ask yourself, “What do I stand for?” Then, write down a list of five or six values that resonate deeply with you. Ask yourself, “How do I live this? For example: The cashier at the grocery store misses charging you for an item. Do you let them know? If honesty is one of your core values, letting them know is never in doubt.
Knowing your values provides a personal compass for your actions.
Conscious Action: Connect your values to your actions. For example, if a driver cuts you off, you can choose to respond with your value of compassion instead of anger. A simple, “Bless them. Forgive me. Forgive them. Bless me,” can restore your equilibrium far faster than endlessly muttering under your breath. (And yes, ‘forgive me’ is important because if you’re human, you probably had a not-so-nice thought or two about them when they cut you off.) This reinforces the idea that every act becomes an expression of your purpose.
When we live on purpose, our values take centre stage.
Embrace the Ripple Effect: Recognize that every action has a ripple. One word shouted in anger can create shockwaves of unease. One word spoken in kindness can resonate like a single harp string pulled in a room full of harps creating a ripple of harmony.By consistently acting from a place of integrity, your positive influence naturally expands. Focusing on conscious living is far more sustainable and fulfilling than constantly searching for a monumental purpose.
To make a difference, live true to your values, principles and beliefs.
Is there a step that feels most accessible to you today? Please share your thoughts and inspire others to live on purpose.
Do you ever hear a little voice inside that causes you to doubt your worthiness?
May reminds me to Celebrate LIFE! Celebrate JOY! Celebrate the incredible people who enrich my world, who have stood by me through thick and thin, always believing.
AND – celebrate being ME! I am worthy.
Have you celebrated the amazing you today? If you could whisper something truly uplifting to your own heart right now, what would it be?
Come join me on my Substack today and let’s have a conversation about just how worthy, amazing and magnificent you are!
I catch my ego in its act of rebellious denial of reality. Wonder Woman defying Ares. Hands on hips. Feet firmly planted. Chest out. Chin up. Defiance personified. I breathe. In. Out. In. Out. Love rushes in.
And in that place, calmness embraces me. Nothing seems impossible. Love ripples through every act.
The muse has a delightful way of weaving her magic throughout my being, even when I’m not paying attention.
Whether I’m walking along the shore, immersed in the quiet of the forest, or kneading dough for bread, her whispers find me. Like tendrils of smoke, these fleeting thoughts curl into my mind, each one vanishing as quickly as the next.
Yet, when I finally return to the page, fingers poised over the keyboard, a torrent of inspiration flows forth, like a stream rushing down a mountainside, seeking the boundless freedom of the river that will lead it to the sea.
I cannot see its source. I cannot feel its pulse. I can only respond to its urgings to let the muse flow free. Surrendering, consonants and vowls, letters and words tumble out seeking form unhindered by my manipulations. As phrases form and coalesce, and I dive beneath the surface meaning like a pearl diver seeking treasure, my creative essence transforms from a thought into reality.
Immersed in the long exhale of creative expression, my thoughts find space and air to breathe on the page; naked, exposed, vulnerable.
And in that vulnerability, I find my heart soaring, my spirits lifting and my voice rising up to sing out loud, “This is Life and I am so grateful for every moment. No matter how I label them, good, bad or indifferent, every moment is full of life teeming with possibility, adventure, hope and Love.”
What a gift!
The Evidence of Time by Louise Gallagher
To age and not fear, to grow older, unburdened by worry, free from the whispers of wrinkles and lines, the creaks and aches, the evidence of time passing.
To live a life where age holds no sway over worth, where spirit soars beyond the measure of years.
This is the defiance of our days, as time's river flows ever forward, calendar pages turning with quickening pace.
These are the reminders of the inevitable truth: One day, the final page will turn, the heart's rhythm will cease its beat, the last breath will softly fade, and the echoes of "I love you" will fall silent.
No magic potion halts the passage of time, no secret formula holds back the years.
Yet, the choice remains ours: To live each day fearlessly, boldly, bravely, passionately alive, with wonder and awe, celebrating every heartbeat, every breath, every whispered "I love you," as precious gifts weaving the grand tapestry of our days into a life well loved. A life well lived.
I awaken from a dream, words flowing effortlessly. I surrender to the current, carried along by the momentum of change.
Big changes are upon us. C.C. and I are selling our beloved home, venturing towards the coast, towards sea level. We seek a sanctuary where his breath can find ease, where the COPD’s barbed-wire grip on his lungs might loosen.
In the midst of preparing our house for the market, it’s easy to forget to breathe. Even without the physical constraints of barbed wire, anxiety can constrict my own lungs.
The vastness of possibilities unfolding before us can get lost amidst the mundane tasks of decluttering and sorting through years of memories. Photos, trinkets, and bookshelves overflowing with stories—each a testament to the life we’ve built together.
This home, lovingly crafted to embrace our family, friends, and furry companions, holds countless tales. Laughter echoing over anger, joy enveloping sorrow, love nourishing us through it all.
Amidst the chaos, it’s easy to forget that this adventure—this journey towards the unknown—has always been our life together.
Will You Dare? by Louise Gallagher
Morning intrigue, a room full of doors, some flung wide, sunlit and warm with possibilities beckoning others cracked slightly open, curiosity whispering an invitation, a door shut tight, locked-up secrets lurking, silent and foreboding.
Beyond each threshold, a mystery unfolding birdsong, a city's hum, the thrum of rain on distant fields a voice, a scream, a cry, a laugh, silence.
Somewhere, a rooster crows morning awakens dawn flees the day awaits.
Which door will you choose? Which unknown path will you dare to tread?
The title of this post is today’s daily question asked by the auto-prompter on WordPress. Good question.
As a child, I believed life improved with age. While that’s largely true, some things, like the scar under my chin from trying to reload a BeBe gun while resting my chin on it, don’t get better—they get richer in stories. Life, it turns out, is a blend of growth and weathering, where some edges soften and others gain character.
Of course, some of that growth can become evident on our bodies. Grey hair, wrinkles, sagging skin, widening hips and fuller bellies tell their own stories of time’s passage. Inside me, however, are the invisible signs of how deep my roots grow and how wise my years have become.
These inner changes aren’t always visible in the mirror, but they are etched into my soul. I’ve come to realize that some of life’s most precious treasures don’t tarnish with time. In fact, they often appreciate in value, much like a beloved antique passed down through generations.
Take, for instance, the understanding I have of myself. It’s no longer a fleeting reflection in a pond, but a deep dive into the ocean of my being. I know what makes my heart sing, what triggers my anxieties, and what fuels my passions. These insights, earned through years of self-reflection and lived experience, (not to mention a whole lot of therapy, personal growth courses and a whole library of self-help books) are like pearls gathered from the depths.
Every mountain scaled, every stumble along the path, has etched itself into the tapestry of my being. Whether a soaring triumph or a humbling tumble, each step of my journey has woven threads of wisdom and resilience into my life’s fabric. As I unearth the hidden treasures within each experience, I find myself lighter, shedding the burdens that once weighed me down, and richer in the boundless currency of joy, gratitude, and love.
My relationships have undergone a similar transformation, with some fading like old photographs and others deepening and strengthening like weathered oak trees. I’ve learned to cherish the connections that nourish my soul and to gracefully let go of those that no longer bring me joy. This discernment, born of time and wisdom, is a gift I wouldn’t trade for youthful naivety.
Even my perception of the world has shifted. The black-and-white landscapes of my youth have given way to a kaleidoscope of colors, textures, and perspectives. I’ve come to appreciate the complexity of human nature, the interconnectedness of all things, and the delicate balance between joy and sorrow. This nuanced understanding is like a mosaic, pieced together from countless shards of experience, with each experience contributing to the masterpiece that is becoming, wth every passing day, the story of my life — a life full of Joy. Gratitude. and Love.
What about you? What do you think grows better with age?
Start here, right where you stand, feet firmly planted on the threadbare rug of your living room, close in to this space you occupy, with weary familiarity surrounded by the clutter and quiet comfort, of your constant yearning for tomorrow to rescue you, from this place where you stand, surrounded by the books you haven't read, the stories you haven’t lived, the paints still drying on the palette, and you, still wishing for change.
Change doesn't arrive with the turning of a calendar page, it comes close in to your choosing to begin right here, in this space you occupy, where the sun struggles to peek through the blinds, where tomorrow's light is hidden, where rose-pink streamers of dawn remain unfurled because you haven't yet started here, where you stand, feet firmly planted on the threadbare rug of your living room, waiting for tomorrow.
Dare Boldly 