Every Monday night I participate in PrimeTime for Emerging Women with Kerry Parsons and a group of women interested in exploring their evolutionary impulse. It is an enlivening, enlightening and invigorating course that brings us together ‘at the well’ as we share and explore what it means to come alive at this moment in time, conscious of the 14 billion years of evolution that brought us here, right now. In this place of being conscious, we operate from the knowing that we must live our daily lives from our source of highest intention, to lift ourselves and others up to the greatest good of all.
Last night, at the end of the circle, Kerry asked each of us to share what it is we are ‘creating’.
I laughed and shared that right now, in that moment, I am creating amusement within me about me. “I am so funny!” — not in a haha way but in a ‘my goodness, I can be so blind to my own peccadilloes when I believe I know everything about me there is to know about me’ kind of way.
Right. I know everything I need to know about me. There is nothing left to uncover.
Yup. I am so funny.
The source of my amusement last night was the thought that burbled up into my awareness as I sat listening to the other women in the circle. “Ya know Louise. You keep telling C.C. (my partner) that ‘feeling safe in relationship’ is vital to the well-being of your relationship. Haha! You’re just using that as an excuse to stay stuck where you’re at.”
I laughed at the inner voice (my Essential self voice) that gave rise to that thought. “Go away,” I told it. “You’re interfering with my being present to the process around me.”
It was not about to slip back into the mists of my inner disbelief that I am magnificent.
“Nope. I’m not going anywhere. You are awakening to the truth. Face it. You are being a passive observer in relationship when you put the onus of ‘feeling safe’ on someone else. You are 100% accountable for everything in your life. And….” Oh oh. I knew the kicker was coming. “If you trust the Universe, then you are always safe and no one else is responsible for your need to ‘feel safe’. You are safe in the arms of the Divine.”
Dang.
There it was, an awareness that had come to me earlier this year when I’d taken a course with Christine Valters Paintner at Abbey of the Arts. I’d created a poem and mandala around the theme of ‘being safe’ in the Universe and written — Letting go of fear, I surrender and fall into Love. I am safe in God’s embrace.
Yup. Definitely a funny gal!
I’d forgotten what I already know. No one else is responsible for my happiness. No one else can ‘make’ me feel…. safe, happy, sad, glad or angry. My responses to their actions/words can give rise to feelings of unease, unhappiness, sadness, gladness, anger. But they cannot ‘make’ me into anything I do not already possess, know or feel.
Sitting in the circle last night, I laughed at myself. Big time.
My belief that my ‘feeling safe’ was the responsibility of someone else was faulty. In believing someone else could give me ‘safety’ I was abdicating self-responsibility and accountability.
In expecting someone else to make me feel safe, I was ignoring the universal truth that lives within me — I am safe in God’s embrace.
To operate from my highest intentions, I must surrender and fall into that which can never fail, Love.
Love is the answer.
Love is all there is.
Love is the way.
Love is.
To make a difference in the world, to live from a place where I lift myself and others up, I must breathe into that place where being different means I let go of my fear that people, circumstances, and the universe will fail me.
They can’t.
I can fail me when I let go of being all I’m meant to be in a world of wonder.
I can let myself down when I take my eyes and all my senses off the truth of who I am in this world.
I am a magnificent being.
We all are.
Let’s go shine! Let’s go light up the world in Love!
And while we’re at it, let’s laugh at our human condition as we awaken to the truth of our essential essence radiating Love, Joy. Harmony and Bliss all around!
Now wouldn’t that be fun!

