Category Archives: Uncategorized

Embracing my servant’s attitude

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It was an easy day to choose to not drive my car or spend money. The snow made driving tricky and, as I didn’t have any meetings scheduled, Ellie had to settle for a couple of walks around the neighbourhood — she didn’t care. She was just happy to be outside, in the snow, playing joyfully.

Because the snow kept falling, I had to shovel my walk twice yesterday. When I went out in the morning to do it, I noticed my two neighbours to the west were still snow-covered. Which, given the snow fell during the night, and work schedules, it’s often easy to leave the sidewalk shovelling until returning from work. I decided to pitch in, to clear their walks — and in the process, got a chance to spend more time outdoors while Ellie raced back and forth along my path, reveling in the snow. When I went out later last night, my neighbour to the east hadn’t come out to clear their walk since much earlier in the day. An older couple, I decided it was a good opportunity to play ‘snow angel’.

This morning, snow covers walks again — but, having kept up with its removal, the load of shoveling won’t be as great.

It is easy to make a difference when I enter my day with a servant’s attitude. Asking, ‘how can I be of service’ creates opportunities for making a difference. Choosing to shovel walks is the simple decision to not listen to the voice that says, “You shovel your own, Louise. Let them shovel theirs.”

Making a difference in the world isn’t about what I do for myself. It’s about what I choose to do for others. No need for fanfare. No need for applause. It is about the simple act of choosing to embrace a servant’s attitude and seek opportunities to be of service.

Yesterday, Cassandra at My Life is My Message posted simple yet powerful ideas on how to make a difference everyday in a post called, It’s the Little Things that Count. Do drop in to visit her if you get a chance — she’s currently in Bali and has posted the cutest photo of two monkies. I’ve invited her to be a guest blogger here some Sunday soon. If you’d like to submit a guest blog, please send me an email or leave a comment!  Thanks.

Together, we can make a world of difference!

 

Engage in the creation of beauty

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A new week. A new day. A new opportunity to make a difference.

It happens everyday. Every moment of every day. And something I’m learning through this process of being conscious of what it means to make a difference is that — being requires action.

Several people have commented to me that ‘you make a difference on blogs everyday Louise.’ Thank you — Fact is, the difference isn’t that I turn up and be present in this white space. It is that I consciously fill this white space with my best with my creative intention to inspire.

My presence, your presence, in the world makes a difference by our being here. Air is displaced. We create ripples of energy as we move through time and space. the challenge is — to ensure the energy we extend to the world is the kind of difference we want to see in the world.

I did an experiment on my walk with Ellie yesterday. We took the paved trail as the off-pavement trail was extremely mucky. As we walked east, I spied a crumbled up kleenex on the path. I only had one bag so I decided to leave the kleenex until our return — and also, to see if anyone else picked it up. We passed several people going in the opposite direction as Ellie and I continued eastward. When we turned around and came back, the kleenex was still there. Bless them. Forgive me. (you know I was thinking not all nice things about those who passed the garbage by…)

This isn’t about those who missed the garbage. It’s about, once again, the action I took to ‘make a difference’. My choice. My decision.

The beauty when we take action is that we create a difference for others to experience and enjoy (there’s that ripple). Absolutely no one will know what I did. And it doesn’t matter. It isn’t about others knowing. It’s about what I’m doing to be the difference I want to create in the world. To have left the kleenex would have made a difference — just not in the direction I want to go.

There is no stasis in being present in the world — we are constantly evolving, always moving towards or away from what we want to create. I want to create a world of beauty — to actively engage in my creation, I must take action, constantly to be actively engaged in creating beauty in the world around me. And that includes picking up garbage.

Ask yourself today — what am I willing to do to create the kind of world I want to live in?

And then, consciously look for opportunities to be engaged in its creation.

Namaste.

When Confidence Wanes by Joyce Wycoff (guest blog)

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A guest blog by Joyce Wycoff.

I first met Joyce a couple of years ago through my blog, Recover Your Joy. Her visit lead me to her blog, Imagine Joy Art — and I am so grateful. Over the past three years I have come to know and admire Joyce greatly. We’ve chatted on Skype, exchanged emails and a friendship I cherish has deepened through cyber-space. Recently, Joyce published, Joy After the Fire, a fascinating and inspiring book about her journey out of grief into joy after the death of her husband. Joyce’s vision is:  To Joyfully Connect & Expand The intention of my art is to create a web of joyful and peaceful connections, linking artist, art, and art lover with the Creative Spirit. The shared connections of art have the power to expand the human spirit and to touch and heal hearts which can then touch and heal our world.

And that is exactly what Joyce does.

When Confidence Wanes by Joyce Wycoff

 
About this image:  In the Garden of East and West by Joyce Wycoff

This is the image used on the invitation for Joyce Wycoff’s Featured Artist show
“Dynamic Dreamscapes” during the month of May
at the Gallery at Marina Square in Morro Bay, CA.  It is currently available at Xanadu Gallery.

**************************************************

First, I want to thank Louise for all the ways she makes a difference in our world.  Her constancy of support and friendship have encouraged me on my journey in a thousand ways.  I am honored to be offering this bit of encouragement to all of you and to thank you for all the ways you make a difference in our world.

I have a fantasy about making a difference:  I fly to Africa and bring light and laughter to the orphans of disease and war.  It’s a good fantasy … but, also one that I know I’ll never do, and that knowledge sometimes makes me feel inadequate.

Recently, however, I’ve been reminded that it’s not just the “Mother Teresa” acts that make a difference; sometimes just saying “yes” can make all the difference.  Almost 20 years ago, I said yes to a new idea that I had no credentials or credibility for attempting.  It was the days of fax machines so I sent out a message to about 30 of my associates basically asking if they would be interested in a new conference focused on creativity and innovation in business.  They said “yes” … or more accurately their response was pretty much, “If you build it, we will come.”  That little bit of encouragement empowered me.

So, I started down an unfamiliar path of designing and producing a conference.  Business innovation conferences are common today but back then it was unplowed ground and I felt ridiculous and fearful.  Who was I to be starting something like this?  But, based on the yes responses of my associates, I started putting together a cast of presenters.  The first guru I approached was Jerry McNellis, the developer of a powerful process of thoughtful collaboration he calls Compression Planning.

I will never forget the moment I called him and asked him (in the tiniest of voices) if he would fly across country to present to an unknown group of attendees at an unproven conference developed by a completely inexperienced planner for no fee … and would you mind paying your own expenses please.  No one could have been more surprised than I was when he said “yes.” It was the beginning of 14 years of a conference that changed a lot of lives … especially mine.

Last week I had a powerful experience of being mentored in my art career (see my blog post My Dinner with Jerome)  During our conversation, I suddenly felt strong and fearless, ready to follow this dream where, once again, I am in strange territory with no credentials for attempting what I want to do.  Jerry’s encouragement was the “yes” I needed.  (It’s interesting that both of my “yes men” were named Jerry.)

This morning I’m in Arroyo Grande (California’s beautiful central coast), writing this in a coffee shop.  On the way over here, I listened to a presentation from Deborah Ivanoff (one of the  SmArtist Telesummit 2012 presenters), who was talking about confidence and the power of remembering our successful memories when our confidence wanes.  She recommends having one or more of these memories at the ready as a “Confidence Emergency Kit.”

Confidence is key to making a difference in the world.  Confidence in our ideas.  Confidence in our ability to take them into the world.  Our memories of saying “yes” and having others say “yes” to us, can give us the confidence to face the uncertainties of today.

So, the next time your confidence wanes, remember your own memories of success.  Somewhere in that memory, you’ll find someone who said “yes” to you, and it will help you find someone who will say “yes” to you now.  And, if you want to help others make a difference in the world, help them remember their own memories of “yes.”  Ivanoff says, “Confidence is just a memory away.”

With confidence, each of us can make a difference in our world.


The Heroes Amongst Us

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First — before my heroes list — I need to mention a ‘comment attack’ from what appear to be spammers — this morning 71 comments appeared in my Spam Log — I waded through them and while a couple appeared legit, I don’t think they were, so I deleted all 71. If I inadvertently deleted a comment from you, my apologies. Please resubmit if possible. Thanks.

And now… The Heroes Amongst Us.

My friend Dave T is a hero. I worked with him for ten months at the shelter where I used to work and I was in awe of his knowledge and professional in fund-raising. Post working together, Dave continues to share his time, talent and expertise without hesitation. Yesterday I met him to discuss a grant proposal I’m preparing for a project and he offered up all sorts of ideas and brainstormed ways to make my proposal better. Dave likes to give back. Dave makes a difference.

Dave T is a hero.

Leah R. gives continuously to people. She’s worked within the homeless sector for more years than I can count and is always willing to go the extra mile to ensure people know, no matter where they stand on the street, they are seen, heard and held in supporting arms. Leah has an amazing personal story which she shared on the DI blog just before I left the shelter. Leah is one amazing and inspiring woman!

Leah R is a hero.

My sister Jackie T. is a hero. She is the primary caretaker of our 90-year-old mother and she gives effortlessly and tirelessly. Not only to mom, but to friends in need, neighbours, her family. Jackie also has a chronic disease that leaves her tired and often living with pain. She doesn’t complain about what life has dealt her, she moves through grace, always lending a hand, helping out, giving to ensure others feel comforted.

Jackie T is a hero.

Debbie H is an emergency room nurse who continuously awes me with her caring nature. She is a role model and a leader. When faced with the challenges of an Emergency room, cut backs in health care funding and staff morale that ebbs and flows, Debbie continuously looks for ways to ‘make it better’. Her difference is felt in patients knowing they receive the best care, in co-workers seeing how easy it is to make a difference by bringing their best, a different perspective to the job, whatever it takes to serve the people in their care and by sharing love and beauty where ever she goes.

Debbie H is a hero.

Who are your heroes? Got anyone in your life needs celebrating right now? Why not tell them of your awe? Why not share your gratitude for their light on your path? We all make a difference when we celebrate the best of those around us. In our celebration, the world is ‘made different’.

Namaste.

Let’s be purposeful.

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Ellie recognizes him from afar. She begins to tug on her leash and whine in anticipation. She’s a strong girl Ellie, even though she’s getting on in years. She’s strong and pulls on the leash, pleading with me to go faster.

When we reach him, he is smiling. Laughing and just as eager as Ellie to connect.

Ellie does her dance of “Oh thank goodness. Finally, someone to pay attention to me. You know she beats me. She keeps me locked in a dark room all by myself. She never feeds me (that one’s a little harder to belief given her bulk — though all of it is hard to believe come to think of it. She’s far too friendly and welcoming to be as hard done by as the picture she likes to pain to strangers.)

Except, this man is no longer really a stranger. We’ve passed eachother on the walk for many months. Though, we’ve missed seeing him and his wife for the past two or three months. He mentions it.

“We thought you might have gone south,” he says as he rubs Ellie’s ears. “Or perhaps something had happened to the old girl.”

And I told him how I’d re-jigged my walking time now that I’m working from home. We laughed and chatted and parted ways and I was reminded again how simple it is to make a difference when we walk through the world conscious of the fact, We are All Connected.

Connecting with this man, his wife wasn’t feeling well yesterday, and spending just a few moments sharing little tidbits of our lives, lightened both our days. We parted, our smiles big and the world looked less lonely, less intimidating.

On my drive home, I passed a woman pushing a baby in her stroller. She passed a plastic bag trapped against the trunk of a tree, stopped, picked it up and stuffed it into the bottom of her stroller.

I saw a young man helping an older woman navigate the curb with her shopping cart.

And I smiled again.

What an amazing world we live in. Sure, there turbulence and strife also abound in this great big world of ours, but, there is also beauty. Imagine what kind of world it would be if today, each of us chose to do one thing that made a difference.

Smile at a stranger. Pick up garbage we spy on the sidewalk, help a stranger.

Just imagine what a ripple of change we would create.

Why not try it? Purposefully step out into your day and chose to do one small thing to make a difference. Something you don’t normally do. And, if you spy someone else making a difference, make sure you acknowledge them and the difference they made. I promise you. You’ll be making a big difference in the world today!

Chance encounters make a difference

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She was there at the end of the trail, where dirt meets concrete. Standing in the sunlight, her bike leaning up against the bench that overlooks the river valley below. It was our second encounter.

“Hey!” she called out as Ellie and I exited the trailhead onto the sidewalk leading back to the parking lot. “So nice to see you again. Isn’t it beautiful?”

And it was. A perfect winter afternoon. Not cold. Temperature hovering around freezing. Bright sunshine spilling shadows across the snow.

We chatted for a few moments and then she exclaimed. “Know what I’m going to do when I get home?” She didn’t wait for an answer before continuing. “I’ve got a lawn chair on my front lawn. We face south. I’m going to take my tea and sit in my chair, I’ll stay dressed up in my outer clothes of course,” and in the same breath, she swept one arm down her brown and red ski suit and kept going. “And I’m going to sit there. Only,” she paused, her bright blue eyes squinting at me, “I’m not sure what to do while I’m sitting there. What do you think I should do? Any suggestions.”

I didn’t really have any suggestions. I was enthralled with this stream of dialogue from a stranger. Enthralled with the beauty of the day.

She didn’t wait for an answer. “You know the neighbours might look at me funny sitting out there in winter. What do you think?” And then she proceeded to tell me about a bedroom that her son had just vacated which she didn’t want to turn into a bedroom again and had a beautiful dresser and… Finally, she took a breath.

“Why do you need a reason to sit out in the sunshine on your front lawn at any time of year?” I asked.

She chortled at my question. “It’s such a habit,” she exclaimed. “Thanks for bringing it to my attention. I’m going to go do it and not worry about what I should be doing doing nothing!” and she hopped on her bike and took off down the trail, her cheery, “Wonderful to chat with you. Hope I see you again!” drifting back towards me.

I smiled. What a perfect encounter.

And when I got home, I grabbed my journal, a pen, a cup of tea, and a blanket to wrap myself in and sat on the back deck, soaking up the afternoon sun, listening to the birds in the bushes and writing myself out onto the page.

In that encounter, I was made different. In that encounter with a stranger, I was inspired to enjoy the moment, to sink into the sunshine and simply be, present.

I met a woman on the trail yesterday. She made a difference.

Namaste.

and… there’s more to the story… visit me at Recover Your Joy to find out all about snow angels and other divine happenings.

Stop Judging

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I had coffee with a dear friend yesterday, one of my oldest here in this city. I needed his guidance on something and he gladly offered up his time.

As we sat and talked and laughed and shared our hopes and dreams and challenges I was struck by how much we have both been ‘made different’ through this friendship.

My friend is pragmatic. He can always serve up a dour perspective on life and the economy, on government’s and social movements that states, ‘we are all going to hell in a handbasket’. In his pragmatic approach I have learned to listen to and honour another perspective, to hear another’s voice with awe and gratitude. And in that hearing, I let go of criticism, and the need to change the other to my point of view and open up to learning and growing on the common ground of respect for one another.

I am less pragmatic, taking a more Pollyanna approach to life and living. I want him to see the goodness in all mankind, the possibility of ‘better’, the imperative of kindness and letting people be their experiences while ensuring no one dies on our streets. His response has generally been, “Then let them experience cleaning up, getting a job, getting on with life. It’s not a free-ride.”

When I worked at the homeless shelter, I struggled to convince him to see the world of homelessness through my eyes. And he resisted my insistence he was wrong to view the world his way. Go figure. Over time, I quit insisting he see it my way by admitting the errors of his way, and moved into a place where his way had equal voice. And in that shift, everything shifted. We were both made different. We both let go of our intransigent views and opened up to the possibilities of another way — another way that lead to the building of common ground for the mutual benefit of all. Where once the line was drawn and we could not cross the barriers of our convictions, the light has filtered in, creating softness in those places where once only hard rock theories abounded.

To make a difference in the world I must let go of my insistence that my way is the only way. Years ago, while healing from an abusive relationship that almost cost me my life, I asked my therapist, “If I’m an experiential learner, why is it I need such big experiences to get to where I want to be?”

And he replied, “There were a thousand paths you could have taken. This just happens to be the one you took. Accept where you’re at and stop judging the journey. Where you’re at is where you’re at. Period.”

To make a difference in the world I must stop judging where others are at and find the common ground of where we all live in a world where everyone has value and every point of view creates a world we can live in without fear.

 

 

Made different

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As I drove along a sideroad to the main thoroughfare on my way back from a meeting yesterday, a man and his dog stood at an unmarked intersection waiting for a break in traffic so that they could cross. I stopped. Motioned for the man to cross.  The man waved, smiled broadly and ran across the road, his dog, leaping and running on his four short legs beside the man, his face turned up to follow every move of his master. I smiled back as I watched and kept smiling as I drove away. They were a picture of joy and their joy entered my heart.

And in that brief interaction where the paths of two strangers intersected, gratitude descended and we were both ‘made different’.

It’s easy to be ‘made different’ in a day. Simply watch for moments where simple gestures that say, “I see you. I honour your presence.” open up, providing you an opportunity to acknowledge someone else’s presence.

Like in a coffee shop when you move to the counter to put a lid on your container and someone else approaches at the same time. Smile. Make eye-contact. Step back, make room for a stranger. Smile again.

Like when entering a revolving door and someone approaches at the same time. Smile. Make eye-contact.  Step back, make room for a stranger. Smile again.

Like when walking down the street and a stranger or a panhandler approaches. Smile. Make eye-contact — no matter your decision to give or not. Smile. Say “Hello.”

It is so easy to go through our day and not ‘see’, really see the people around us. Yet, in those moments of grace where we acknowledge their presence, when we say through a simple smile, “I see you. I honour your presence on my path.”, we too receive the gift of being present, being visible in someone else’s life. We too are ‘made different’ in that moment of connection.

I stopped to let a man and his dog cross the road yesterday and in that moment I was ‘made different’. My heart filled with joy and I carried my smile openly for the rest of my drive home.

On living and dying

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I had another blog planned for this morning, but then I read Diana Schwenk’s mention of Hazel Gillespie’s passing, and clicked on the link she shared to Staying in Touch with Hazel.

Before I worked at the homeless shelter, I had never been to a hospice. The first time I went, it was by accident. A long time client, a photographer who found his gift through participating in the art program I’d started, was being moved from the shelter-owned apartment he’d been living in as cancer eroded his body’s strength, to hospice one cold December day in 2009. That evening, I called the hospice to find out how he was doing and they informed me, ‘he won’t last the night’. I didn’t want him to be alone amongst strangers as he passed over and so I drove out to the country where the hospice was situated and held his hand while he let go of life. It was one of the most profound and moving moments of my life.

The next time, was just last year when Terry Pettigrew, a man I’d grown to know and love at the shelter, also moved into hospice for his final days. He lived two weeks after moving in, and this time, his brother held his hand, a brother he hadn’t seen in 34 years. It was a blessed moment. I spoke about Terry during a presentation I gave on Saturday for the This is My City Festival panel discussion, On Common Ground and wrote about my experience of remembering Terry on my blog at Recover Your Joy today.

Both experiences with hospice staff have left me feeling grateful for their amazing grace in our world — they make a world of difference. Their humility and compassion, their ability to shine a light on the ‘ending’ while holding space for life to slip away with grace, has inspired me and given me great comfort.

And then, this morning I clicked on the link to Staying in Touch with Hazel that Diana shared and I was moved again by Love. In the beauty and tragedy of our lives, it is Love that carries us through. And, it is the love of people who share our journey, who light our path, who surround us in care that makes the journey hard to let go of, even when we must. In Hazel’s last few weeks on earth she was surrounded by four women committed to holding her hand, to reading to her, laughing with her, being with her in Love. I read back through their stories at Staying in Touch with Hazel, and I am in awe of their beauty.

The world is in good hands when those hands are the loving hands of those who work and care for the dying in hospices, and those who care for the one’s they love as Vicky, Christine, Barb and Judy cared for Hazel.

What an amazing difference they make in our world. What amazing light and grace they bring to living and dying.

Blessed journey Hazel Gillespie. May Love hold you forever more.

What if God was One of Us? (guest post by Shirley A.)

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When I first met Shirley she was a client at the homeless shelter where I worked. A first nation’s woman who was adopted into a non-native family as an infant, she once told me she didn’t know where she fit in. Recently she wrote in an email to me, White God… or Native… what ever… Louise I am not of either… I am a child of God.. .and you can believe what you want… all I know is God is Love…. .all I know is and feel is love… and for me that is reading loving things, but so often I put that down as I don’t quite accept it…It has nothing to do with White, Native… all I know in my heart is there is a God…. Louise I have talked with those brothers on the street.. we have come to a conclusion…we are of God…you know why…it’s because God spends extra time with us…That Homeless man or women don’t you think they prayed… and felt and seen God…it’s more an inner feeling…I have always had this spirit in me…. I get so messed up…I am not Native nor white…but I do LOVE GOD… and you can’t take that from me…… sometimes that is all I had.. .yes when I walked the walk God was there.

Shirley is a gifted writer, story-teller, artist. She carries other labels too — recovering addict, formerly homeless. No matter the label, Shirley carries it in her very real, very human way. With dignity. Grace. Beauty. She laughs, jokes (she has a wicked sense of humour) And, she struggles. Just like you and me. Struggling in our human condition. We all have gifts. We struggle to find ourselves, express ourselves, be the selves we know, deep within our souls, we are born to be. We struggle to let go of self-defeating behaviours. To drop burdens and sorrows and tears. We struggle and in our struggle we sometimes fall. And in our falls, we discover the depth of our strength and courage.

I am grateful for Shirley’s light on my path.

Here’s a story on making a difference from Shirley which she has given me permission to share here. Thank you Shirley

What If God Was One of Us? 

By Shirley A.

Yesterday went to eat at McDonalds…While eating a group of Natives which I know you would know came in and ordered a meal for the 4 of them.  Something in my heart was tugging me telling me I was to buy them each a hamburger…..I thought I needed this money in case…but the tugging became stronger….It told me to buy them each a burger….

I thought then with what little they had was what they were to share….amongst themselves…I knew I had to do what my heart was telling me….so I bought 4 burgers…even with the thought of I don’t have enough money for me…….I walked up to them with burgers in hand and gave them the burgers….

You know….those smiles and thankfulness in their eyes does bring tears to one’s eyes…..but better yet I did what my heart told me to do….as hard as it was to let go of my own wants and worries of money.  Then I headed off to work……I work in a warehouse…so I had my backpack and hood on…..A man approached me and said to me….”could I offer to buy you a meal”  I said no thanks…

He said I looked like I needed a little uplifting…..He then asked if he could say a prayer for me….I said Yes…..His prayer was short and simple and of no attention grabber to the rest of the world.

You know I think God was tugging at my heart and then made it known to me through a prayer from a stranger….

So yes kind of out there as a homeless person….once again reminding me… miracles happen….God does hang also with the homeless out there….So my time as a homeless person has not been in vain…..but I now am able to see it clearer now…

At work I felt so alive, awake…and yes, able to breathe….which I haven’t felt for a very long time in my life…I am telling you this because those miracles happened on a daily basis as a homeless person.

I was reminded of what homelessness can be of….The sharing of what little one has….and that, one is taken care of….and that God does love each one of those out there…and He does hold them close……

The smallest miracle turns into a pure feeling of ………….within the heart…reminds me of the song…”What if God was one of us?” by ? Osborne…..makes one think…